Crippler Crossover

So before me or anyone else talks about any of these bands anymore: Crucial Unit, Municipal Waste, Hummingbird of Death, Kill Your Idols, Slayer, Leeway, Suicidal Tendencies, North Side Kings, or Capitalist Casualties, we need to talk about D.R.I.
Ultra old school, ultra fast, ultra D.I.Y. hardcore from Texass. The Dirty Rotten Imbeciles are one of the few bands to write the rules for crossover, thrash, hardcore, and fastcore. And probably indirectly for grind and powerviolence too. On this LP (The Dirty Rotten LP) they blow through 27 in less than an equal amount of time. Almost always keeping it interesting mixing in slower parts ("I Want More", "Violent Pacification", "The Explorer") with just rad fast hardcore. The drums are fast circle pit beats side by side with loud talking vocals. Not much yelling or screaming, just loud fast talking and some regular fast talking and a little normal talking, all discussing lyrics of various subject matter. Serious, fun and overall important things are discussed. Their guitar player shows nods to his favorite bands with Discharge ("Dennis' Problem"), and the staple DC and OC bands ("Closet Punk", "Commuter Man" etc.). These influences are good to have though since it keeps the ideas new and flowing but only in the circular constraints of awesomeness. Sort of like a circle pit. Album highlights for me are "Money Stinks", "Couch Slouch (The Crucial Take)", "I Don't Need Society", and "Snap". I can't explain that last one, that's just how it is.

"Money stinks, money stinks. Yeah it stinks."

Here's a full split that will only get half reviewed. Why? Because only one side blew me away. Sylvester Staline is a French poweviolence band that blasts like having a Fuck On The Beach never went out of style. Screaming, blazing(LOL GET IT) fast hardcore about Satan and smoking weed. Most of the songs titles give indications how they feel about recreational cannabis use. I've never been, but I wouldn't be inclined to see the French as crusty stoner punks, but here they are blasting away between feedback laden interludes. This four piece really puts out a cacophonous wall of sound. The only real low end is in the bass which lays down some thick groove over two-stepping drum beats. They're druer doesn't do much beyond two-steps and blasts but that's a-hokay with me. The vocals and guitar are both wailing, screeching forces of punk recognition only discernible by lyrics, which are unintelligible and almost exclusively about weed. Tre bien!
Appropriate anecdote, my friend Teen Wolf has a steam roller pipe in the form of Satan. What do we do? Smoke out of it listening to these guys and Slayer!
There aren't too many bands I'm aware of from France besides these guys and maybe with reason, because they're so sick. Seth. Rainbow of Death. Gojira. None hold a candle to Sylvester Staline. Like I said, grinding powerviolence!

"Hey ladies! If you ain't no bitch, don't like to be called bitch, put ya hands up like this, here!"

7" to Do Bong Rips To

I've been seriously rocking the Birdflesh/Embalming Theatre split 7". If I could find a physical copy for myself I'd play the shit out of it but instead I've just listening to it nonstop on my iPod. Although I must admit I only listen to the Birdflesh side, even though Embalming Theatre do an Infest cover, and only the first four tracks. "Vikings From the North(Carnage From Beyond)" is good every once in a while but I usually skip it. The black metal vocals and tongue-in-cheek lyrics with the newer style Darkthrone music turned upbeat instead bleak and grim is entertaining but not a conducive to getting ripped and rocking the fuck out.
The rest of this side of the EP is some sick death metal influenced grind. Deep, gruffly growled vocals with thick, well produced blasts and chugging riffs. Kind of the Attack of the Mad Axe Men style if that helps, especially because i have this idea of both bands always playing with huge smiles the whole time. My favourite track is "Blind Butcher" because it has the most energy. The whole time I want to circle pit and fucking kick people in the face. There's even a violin solo and a hilarious sound clip. But don't take just my word for it. Smoke. Listen. Grind.

"I am so big and müscular!"